Flashing Lights: Last night when I went to watch the fireworks BY MYSELF (Thanks a lot Sarah! I had to ooh & ahh with the bushes instead of a gorgeous Kiwi girl. Hmmph) one of my shoelaces came untied. When I bent down to tie it up, I happened to be right beside a couple of ambulances. Somehow, the way the Security people and the EMT's were looking around and then looking at me, I totally felt like I was in a movie where they send in the rookie or the girlfriend to casually plant the bomb or steal the diamond or put the sign on somebody's back. I felt guilty & suspicious TYING MY OWN SHOE. I do not know why my head runs off down the road flying these kites of crazy thoughts sometimes. Another scenario where I find it hard to maintain eye contact doing something completely normal is when I have to buy Nuv's smokes. I think it's because I'm always ID'd, I try to look & sound as 30.5 as possible, but they always see my shifty eyes and mouth twitchings, so they ask for ID, I proudly show them & everybody else in line, and then that's about it. Somehow, I have a problem looking & acting innocent & law abiding, something I TOTALLY AM. I swear.

The Lion Video is killing me: You know, the reunion of the century with the lion and the two men that raised him, then released him into the wild. I cannot watch it without A) crying and B) narrating it something like "My Dads? What in the....MY FUCKING DADS ARE HERE! DADS! DADS! DADS!"

Another scintillating scorcher of a day: The best part of my 9-5 was when my niece came by for a visit. I opened the sliding door of the van to say hello, and with a smile, she handed me the plastic purple egg she was holding. She'd be damn near perfect if her toddler boogers didn't make me gag so much.