The One-A-Day Week, Volume 2

The Wet Post

I bought a new shower curtain from London Drugs and yes, it’s the one they call a ‘liner’, which is code to me for ‘cheap and manageable shower curtain.’ Because I don’t know, I’m getting miserly in my old age and paying more than 3$ for something to keep my wet off the bathroom floor just seems too much. So, guess what? Despite the weighted magnets along the bottom, this thing LOVES US. It wants to TOUCH us, it wants to CREEP ME OUT in every way. It’s like a fucking ghost always wanting to help you, “Ohohoh, yoohoo! Can I help you shave?! Can I touch your arm and scare the Christ right out of you? Can I? PUUHHLLLEEEEEASE?” [Amazing side note: A buddy of ours used to sneak up on his girlfriend in the bathroom and hug her though the curtain, and the fact she never shit herself in absolute fear is something I am amazed by every day.]

There was a weird bug in the sink so I squished it with my bare finger. I have no qualms about doing this with bugs of a certain size and shape. It was not the best thing I touched all day, but it kept me from having to fish it out of something I wanted to eat, so totally worth it.