what else to expect when you’re expecting (the fiestas)

Monday night we went on a tour of the Hospital where the bubs will be born. Us and 80 other expectant couples. Not that I thought we were special, but evidently September is crazy busy for the maternity ward because of all the Christmas, New Years and Valentines Day coital celebrations. I thought I was overly judgy of regular girls. But pregnant girls – I ripped them to bloody shreds in my head. But only the ones that still had visible collarbones, toned arms and cute outfits. AKA all of them. There should be a sign at the Vancouver city limits stating in large print: All dumpy pregnant women head back to the suburbs. There is no place for you here.
Read More

Heat delay

I could bottle the sweat coming off my neck, under my belly and off my butt - it's really that bad. Kinda makes sitting down and writing as appealing as reorganizing the apartment all weekend to find we still really don't have enough room for another member of this family. Oh wait, we did that. And it sucked. And my feet and ankles are plump and tingling. Thanks August for saving the best for last!


Seriously though, new post with lots to tell by Thursday.


In the meantime, looky here at my last R2AK column where I count down my Top 5 Concerts.

ooze

O hey, remember that one time it was so stupid hot that you oozed across the city looking for a fan like it was the answer to all of life's mysteries and you reinforced your hatred for Canadian Tire and Home Depot because their employees love to chat right after they tell you they never have what you want while you're already back in your car frantically rolling down the passenger side window while driving with no seatbelt praying the next stop has even a blade, a pole and some glue so you can sleep
Read More

running in circles

I'm pretty sure the recent weather here is signaling End of Days. Seriously, it's like Vegas hot. Especially at dusk when you could be wearing a scarf and dental floss and not have a single goose bump. It was a long freezing winter whereupon I wore my grey duffle coat all day every day, literally. I didn't need a purse what with all the pockets in that coat. If I become famous, that coat will be hung in the Smithsonian.
Read More