(contest closed) it's a book party and you're invited PLUS a *GIVEAWAY*

It's been a HOT SECOND since I did any meaningful writing and maybe that's because I saved all my good shit for the NEW BOOK I'M IN THAT YOU CAN BUY TODAY.

*fires confetti gun*

*gets confetti in eye*

*spends weekend worrying about losing that eye*

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my 2017 #streamteam may

I did a lot of real-live-person stuff in May. (Versus my usual eyeballs-poking-out-from-luxurious-blanket weekend slothery. I did more stand-up! I bombed but it's okay! I helped plan and attended a stagette where I did a Beyonce dance class and learned that with age I have grown 67% more terrible with organized choreography! I got spoiled for Mother's Day and was reminded again how lucky I am to have a husband who collaborates with my kid to make me feel so special!

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leap into summer with Goh Ballet {giveaway}

If you looked up "moves with grace and finesse" in the dictionary of Opposites, you would find a picture of me, hunched over, silently howling because I just stubbed my whole body on a piece of furniture that has been in the same place for 5 years. Every day I forget my dimensions, my whereabouts in this world, and how close and far I am to people and sharp corners. I am a bumbler. That's how I navigate this Earth. Muttered "OUCH'S" and smacked shinbones.

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my 2017 #streamteam april

Do you ever hit Play on a show and know in your bones it is a terrible decision but you do it anyway and then ruin your entire day because you should have listened to EVERY SINGLE CELL IN YOUR BODY? That is essentially my life's work. Ignoring instincts or pushing through them like corn down a goose's throat. 

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making better mom memories with groupon coupons

Do you ever wonder what memories your child will remember most when they grow up? Memory is a funny thing; how does our brain choose what to keep and what to set fire to? What joyous parts of my youth had to be clear cut to try and cram in algebra? What parts of my teenage years were set free when I had to learn baby CPR?

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